Saturday, November 30, 2013

What I've felt, what I've known...

I founthis and decided to play...

It's a long weekend, you know, and I have 500 other things I'm supposed to be I made this one of them!

I didn't answer all the questions though. Too many. I made an executive decision and EDITED...because a lot of the questions have already been answered on this blog anyway. I hate to be repetitive. And redundant. :) 


3-Do you ever wish you were someone else?

Yes. Is that not politically correct?

5-How old are you?

I find this question extremely offensive.

6-Age you get mistaken for:

This used to be a good question. Now I don't want to talk about it.

7-Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality:

Aquarius, yes.

8-What did you do on your last birthday?

I believe I cried a lot.

9-What is one thing you would like to accomplish before your next birthday?

Accomplishing ANYTHING would be amazing. I'd like to do THAT.

20-Left or right handed?

It took me a while to figure out why I use both hands for stuff, because I distinctly remember that I used to be right-handed. 
Then I realized, by the time I was ten, my right arm had been in a cast twice - once at five, and again at ten.
(I'm clumsy. I've had several broken bones.)
I guess when you're a kid, you just adapt. I use my left hand to open bottles, eat with utensils, stuff like that. I still use my right hand to write, but if I get tired, I just switch hands.

21-What’s your sexual orientation?

That is a very personal question.

27-Do you have any “rules” about food?

Yes! Do we really wanna go there again?
No pork, no beef. No chocolate, no peanut butter. No nuts of any kind.

52-Ever broken any bones?

Ha! See above...
Jaw...twice. At 3, and at 15.
Arm, 5. Thumb, 10. Leg, 3 years ago.
Hmmm, I think I'm forgetting something, because I thought I've broken six, and that's just five. They all run together...most of these occurrences involved falling of some sort. I'm challenged.

53-Ever come close to death?

Last year. Emergency surgery. I needed a blood transfusion. I didn't realize I was close until afterwards. I was just grateful for the people who donated. So grateful.

66-Something you do without realising:

If I don't realize it, how can I talk about it?


71-What’s your favorite color?

I like all colors, but I would have to say I'm partial to blue.
Kentucky blue.

73-What’s your favorite movie?

I canna choose just one, Captain!

74-What are your favorite books?

Is it too soon to go back to loving Ender's Game? The best book ever!?

75-What is your favorite quote and why?

(see above) The enemy's gate is DOWN...

78-What is your favorite type of food?

Chocolate and peanut butter.
Which I am not allowed to eat anymore.
So, no food. :(

79-Your favorite ice cream?


80-What’s your favorite animal?

The elephant, of course.

85-What is your favorite season?

Winter! Let it snow, no bugs, less sun, nice and's perfect!

86-What are the top five places you wish you could go before you die?

Alaska, Hawaii, the places in Germany where I grew up, Australia, Patagonia.


106-Would you ever smile at a stranger?

I have...I do. But my eyes quickly slide away...I'm sure I look like a complete creep.


181-How often do you listen to music?

All day if I can.

182-What kind of music you like?

I like all kinds, but I do tend towards indie, folk, singer/songwriter and alternative-type music the most.

187-A song that’s been stuck in your head:

3 Doors Down - Kryptonite.

188-Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that play:

Metallica - One
Linkin Park - Numb
Shane Mack - Lie To Me
NIN - Hurt
Kris Kristofferson - The Silver Tongued Devil and I
OneRepublic - Secrets
The Lumineers - Morning Song
Stevie Wonder - Superstition
Switchfoot - This is Your Life
Slow Runner - No Disassemble

189-A book you want to read/have recently read:

I am currently reading Moonless by Crystal Collier. :)

190-Describe your dream library:

You mean like Lucien's in The Sandman series?
Get it? 'Dream' library? HAHAHAHA...

191-Last movie you just watched:

Rise of the Guardians.


193-You’re in a tattoo parlor about to get inked. What are you getting done?

The only kind of ink I would ever get would be some kind of remembrance tattoo. And really, I'm not grandpa forbade it long ago. :)

194-What’s something you can see yourself going to jail for?

In all seriousness? Before I quit driving, it would have been for any number of traffic offenses. Nowadays, I can't think of anything I'm doing that's illegal. I'm a RESPONSIBLE ADULT, my reckless days are behind me!

199-If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?

As bad as everything has been, I couldn't possibly delete anything.
Life is what it is.
I will take the bad with the good.

200-You’re an Action Movie Hero. What’s your weapon of choice and the line you scream when defeating your arch enemy?


204-Halloween costume idea?

Are you kidding? I've never, in my whole life, had a good Halloween costume idea. I'm very unoriginal.

207-Would you rather be stranded on a desert island with someone you love for ten years or someone you hate for a month? Explain why.

I can get along with anyone for a month. But alone with someone for ten years...that's just asking for trouble.

Friday, November 29, 2013

Giving thanks #3; When the world's all as it should be...

So we were at Dwayne's parents' house yesterday, and Chelsea, Halie, (Dwayne's niece), Dwayne and I were sitting at the kitchen table talking.

"You know," Chelsea said, "I was looking at my pictures, and this is the exact same outfit I wore last year for Thanksgiving. Right down to my hair clip."

After we got done laughing, Chelsea continued...

"You know what else? This is also the exact same outfit I wore two years ago at Thanksgiving. Also, the same hair clip."

It was hilarious.

I don't know what it is about Thanksgiving that brings out dysfunction AND humor at family dinners.

Dwayne's little brother, Jermey (yes, that is how it is spelled) has lost 150 pounds in the past couple of years, and in the process he's became a health and fitness freak.

Have you ever had Thanksgiving dinner with a recently converted health and fitness freak?

What happens is, you get a running commentary on everything you put in your mouth, interspersed with moaning and groaning about how he's eaten SO MUCH and he's going to run 9 miles in the morning to make up for it.

I heard the 9 miles thing several times.

And then this happened:

"Dude, you really need to look into acai berries. They really give your colon a good cleansing."

Really? While we're eating? LOLOLOL

So then we escaped to my grandpa's house where things were much, much worse.

We pulled into the driveway about ten seconds before my obnoxious big brother, who gets out of the car and says, "Now I KNOW we're late if we're getting here after YOU!"

He's so kind.

My mom's inside looking kind of busy so I stay out of her way.

Look...I'm slow and clumsy, and trust me, in times of high stress, she can be vicious. It's better for everyone if I DON'T HELP.

After the bad thing that happened last year, mom and Aunt Sondra decided to get turkey and dressing from Cracker Barrel and make everything else.

So Aunt Sondra comes in with the Cracker Barrel stuff and with Alyssa The Perfect, and things kick into high gear, and oh. my. gosh.

After everything calms down, everyone has food and no blood has been drawn, the analysis starts.

Mom: Next year, we're going out to eat. This is ridiculous.
Aunt Sondra: Well, when Moma was here, we all sat down, the food was passed around, and she didn't sit down until everyone got their food.
Mom: Well, I don't wanna do that.
Me: Yeah, and Moma never yelled at us.
John: Yeah.
Me: Yeah, you were really mean.
Mom: I know, I can't help it.

Here's where it gets bad, as if comparing my mother to my grandmother wasn't bad enough.

Me: You and Aunt Sondra are both really mean anymore.
John: Yeah.
John: You know what it is?
Me: What?
Me: Oh no.
John: (to the table at large) You two need to get a man!

I don't even want to talk about the discussion that happened after that.

So, Thanksgiving in a nutshell! The silent ones in these two venues are the ones who are nice and don't start trouble, including and especially Dwayne! 

As you can see, I am an instigator. The world sees me as silent and pure, but I'm really not that nice. I try, I really do. But when I see a pot, I have to stir it. 

That reminds me to tell you all sometime about the meeting at work this week...I don't know why I can't keep my mouth shut? What is wrong with me?!?!?!

I had a wonderful Thanksgiving with my two wonderful families (Dwayne's and mine), bickering and all! I am blessed and I know it!

Happy weekend!

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Giving thanks #2; In the land that is plentiful...

Thanksgiving has always been my grandmother's day - her Big Show. She would begrudgingly allow everyone to bring one (pre-approved) dish for Thanksgiving dinner, but that was it! She was determined to make and prepare everything herself, and worked for days to give us a veritable feast. 

This will be our third Thanksgiving without her, and it still hasn't gotten any easier. My family's very close, you know, and the 14 of us celebrate something at least a couple times a month, and there's always an empty space now. Thanksgiving hurts the most.

Despite all this, I'm reminded on Thanksgiving of how grateful I am. I gladly accept the pain of loss, because I wouldn't ever give up loving and having had a close relationship with my grandma. I don't know anyone who has a family like mine. I am blessed.

I am thankful.
I have my family.
I have my daughter.
I have my mom.
I have my Dwayne.
I have my kitty.
I'm alive.
I survived.
I had the best grandmother in the world.
I have a place to live (complete with a living room floor-sleeper, but that's another story).
I have a job.

Love you all... Happy Thanksgiving. :)

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Giving thanks #1; When I'm found in the desert place...

What I like to call 'the mess hall years' are one of the many things I am thankful for.

I am one of the privileged few who have dined in the mess hall for Thanksgiving dinner.

My dad was stationed in Germany for the second time, and this second time around he insisted on taking his family with him. For three whole years.

It was hard being away from my grandma - my mom, my brother, my grandma and I were freakishly close.

And Thanksgiving was my grandma's day to shine.

So when Thanksgiving came around, my mom didn't cook anything at all. We piled in the car, drove on base and went to the mess hall.

I thought she was mistaken. Where's my homemade dressing and gravy?

NO, none of that...We were eating at the mess hall - which would be where we had every Thanksgiving while we lived in Germany. 

We were right there on base, with the soldiers dressed in their BDU`s - single guys who lived in the barracks, who didn't even have their families to eat with that day.


I'm so thankful for people who sacrifice, and believe in good things. 

I'm so thankful for heroes, and courage.

I'm so thankful for love.

And, okay, I was really thankful when we came back home and I experienced a REAL (read: my grandma's) Thanksgiving dinner again.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope...

Vincent Van Gogh - Roses, 1889

1. Another migraine. Started early this morning. I'm ready to go get rid of my sorrows by downing some chocolate and peanut butter - if I feel this bad anyway, how much worse can it be?

2. I'm not really going to do that - It can always get worse!

3. My liver, for instance, can't be in very good shape anymore. I don't drink, but I swallow painkillers like candy. When I'm in the midst of a migraine, I'll take whatever's on hand until I get relief from the pain. It doesn't matter if I've already taken four Excedrin Migraine, if the pain hasn't gone within an hour, let's take four Motrin and see if that works. 

4. And since the neurologist nixed all the OTC stuff and put me on RX drugs only, it's just upped the stakes.

5. Sorry, no more pain talk. If I can make it one more month, that will make 2013 a HOSPITAL-FREE year! Yay....

6. 2010-Hospital E/R. Broken leg. Complications. THREE months off work.

7. 2011-Um, 'Special' Hospital. TWO and a HALF months off work.

8. 2012-Hospital. Blood transfusions. Surgery. TWO months off work.

9. 2013-Recovering. All year long. I'm so much better in November than I was in January. I am thankful.

10. I sooo wanna talk about Doctor Who with someone, but no one I know has watched it! (Chelsea had to work.) It was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!

11. I've written about all I can, I have to go take another pill now and lay down in my dark room and think about all I've done to deserve this pain. :)

Friday, November 22, 2013

I'm still looking up...

Comet McNaught above Ashburton, NZ, 2007

I probably should have written this before I took the Ambien, because now my eyes are shutting and what I had intended to write about is gone...gone to wherever Ambienesia thoughts and acts go to die.

I keep drifting off and coming back, I hope I don't Ambien-say something completely inappropriate.

(six hours later)

I'm awake now! And now I don't really remember even writing those first two paragraphs, but, ooookay...

I mean, I'm sure I wrote it. It's not like I think a ghost did it. Chelsea believes that there is a ghost or spirit or entity or whatever that lives in this apartment. 

She says she talks to it.

I try not to think too hard about things like that.


6:30 a.m. on a Friday. I have to start getting ready for work. I PROMISE I'll be fully present this weekend.

It's just been very hard this week, you know, going to work every day and stuff. LOLOL

I'm cracking myself up. I guess you had to be there. not to make this a wasted entry, I'll leave you with this:

It's tomorrow! Are you ready?

Monday, November 18, 2013

I wanna lay down in the falling snow...


Today I did the thing I never, ever thought I would do.

I volunteered to give up my desk by the window.

My beautiful sanctuary in the corner where no one bothers me - which I snagged by kind-of-underhanded-means years ago - has become my enemy.

See, my area already stands out in the office, because all the lights above my desk are out. I like it dark.

And the shades always remain shut.

And behind the shades, I have flattened cardboard boxes up against the window, to block any sunlight that might get in between the cracks.

And if any sunlight STILL tries to get in, I have taped up pieces of paper that I move periodically throughout the day as the sun moves...and sigh in relief every day after noon when it goes to the other side of the building.

But even after all that, today the sun still got through. It kept reflecting off the silver windowsill right into my eyes...

until finally, after the fourth or fifth time of knifelike pain, bam! A migraine was born.

I don't always make the most rational decisions when I'm in pain, trying to remain at work, and I've taken two Vicodin and a Flexeril. But I'm so sick of pain.

So I'm switching with Mark. He's deliriously happy to be moving desks for reasons I can't talk about in public. At least someone's happy.

Well, probably lots of people will be happy...they'll get to have sunlight again, and stuff.


Having me in your office is kinda like having Death hanging around, if you think about it. Or, not Death...EEYORE.


Sunday, November 17, 2013

All must be well...

So, yeah, apparently, 'we're leaving at 9' really does mean 9, and not 10 or 11 or something more civilized. Who knew?

I really did intend to get up and be ready to go - I got up at 8, fixed some Lucky Charms, and promptly fell back asleep.

So instead of going down to London to decorate Moma's grave for winter, I woke up and fell asleep and felt guilty all day.

I spent quality time with my kitty. Our pets embody the joy and pain of life...the love is so pure, but everyday my heart breaks a little, because odds are I will outlive her. Sometimes I don't know how we stand to live with what we've seen and the knowledge we have.

I played my app some...I'm addicted to this kind of battle card RPG on my phone. It's well established that I'm a geek, so, there you go. :)

I watched some Glee.

I spent some time today trying to figure out what color my eyes are. I try to do this every once in a while. I have central heterochromia, which is a fancy way of saying each eye has two or more distinct colors. My eyes have a yellow starburst thingy around the pupil and then the iris is green. Usually. Only sometimes it's gray, or blue. So most days I have green eyes, and a few days I'm Arthur Dent.

Today I was Arthur Dent. I have eye-colored eyes.

What I did not do for most of the day was get on the computer. I guess I was taking a break even though I didn't intend to take a break.

When Chelsea got home from work it was like life and sunshine entered the house again. For being such a grump, she sure brings laughter and happiness wherever she goes anymore. I guess it's hard keeping up the grump face when you're working your dream job at your favorite place in the world!

She's my joy.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Mostly, it's for the love.

I left for work at my usual time this morning...7:20 a.m.

I actually got to work way past my usual time this morning...9:26 a.m.


So my mom and I are just happily driving along, looking forward to another fun-filled day at our jobs, when her car just goes dead. At 65 mph. On the expressway.


She managed to get the car over to that little triangle on the exit ramp and promptly called AAA. We were assured that we were a priority because we were on the expressway.

Over an hour later we were still sitting there.

SCARY, with the semis speeding past us on both sides!

But we did finally get rescued. I was endeavoring to make a point, what was it?...



1. My wonderful mother and wonderful boyfriend have never wavered, never complained once, about ferrying me back and forth from work since I stopped driving two years ago. I am still fully licensed, insured and I have a working vehicle. It's just my mind that hasn't caught up yet. 

2. When the tow truck FINALLY came, Dwayne also met us on the expressway, and took us to Popa's so we could take Popa's van, because Dwayne had to go pick up Chelsea to take her to work. Dwayne's my hero and my family is truly special.

3. My mom carried the AAA gold card for years but I noticed that now, she's down to the regular AAA. Then I remembered why. After I totaled my Focus and bought my Chevy Malibu, I really had trouble figuring out the gas gauge. On Ford cars, I swear being on E means you can drive 30 more miles or so and be okay. In the Malibu, however, the orange light comes on and immediately the car stops.... 

...AND SO I RAN OUT OF GAS SO MANY TIMES. It got to where I became a joke around the office, because I called in late so many times for being out of gas. Then, inevitably, I used up all of my mom's service calls on her AAA plan. For the whole year. She was really mad. ... So anyway, I am very blessed to have a mother who doesn't hold a grudge. :)

We're going tomorrow to the cemetery, just down there and back. It's about five hours of driving at the least, but we're used to it...and we're taking the VAN and not the CAR.

I forgot about Blessing #4: We didn't get killed today...we were a tiny bit scared. STILL ALIVE.

'Kay, think I'm really done. Love y'all g'night.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

I'm gonna go to the place that's the best...

Jim Irwin on the moon, Apollo 15, 1971

For about 20 years now, space has been my obsession, with a specialty in the history of manned space flight. Let's call it...Michelle's college.

So while I was going to real college and studying my way through every boring philosopher on the planet; 

I was also going to Michelle's college and studying my way through every available book on the space program that had ever been printed. 

I can be obsessive.

To understand half of these books I had to take physics as an elective. I voluntarily signed up for physics...that's how obsessed I was with becoming an expert on this stuff.

I went to see NASA people speak, I saw monuments and astronaut's childhood homes, visited the museums where their spacecraft are, read not only the history books and the tech books, but also all the biographies. 

I even read the books on the Soviets and their space program - they had one, too, you know - Sputnik, Soyuz, and a poor little doggy named Laika, and a hero named Yuri Gagarin, and also the first woman in space, Valentina Tereshkova.

And then I got to the point where I actually already knew everything in the new books I was getting.

BUMMER. It's like when you get to the end of a TV series. What now?

So I started trying to teach.

You know, some people just don't appreciate the value of having a true expert in their midst.

Take Chelsea, for instance.

I'll say, hey Chels, you know, your birthday, July 21, is also the date that the Apollo astronauts--

But I can't even finish saying the word 'astronauts' before she shouts 'NO' and leaves the room.

What's up with that?

Or, sometime at work when we're desperately trying NOT to work, I'll bring up my favorite subject, the Saturn V rocket, and my dear co-workers suddenly develop a pressing need for smoke break/potty break/uh, I'll go with one of you break.

What's up with THAT?

The very worst was last year when my nephew's homework assignment was a report on one of the Apollo missions.

It was the most exciting thing ever!

For the whole two minutes it took to get to my brother's house, get inside, and try to talk about my favorite subject in the whole world to an 11-year old who's intent on playing his DS thing.

He did not care about the Apollo missions, at all.


So, to bring a very long, boring story to an end (sorry), I no longer try to talk about my favorite thing.

(Except for that one time when we were watching Big Bang Theory and Howard was going up in the Soyuz and I was telling Dwayne about the Soyuz landing, and then they said exactly what I had just said on the TV. That was cool.)

I'm underappreciated.


Okay, all joking aside, it makes me sad that no one wants to know about our incredible feat to get to the moon, or how and why it happened. 

Or why the program stopped at 17, and why the Saturn V - the rocket that took us to the moon - cannot be made today. 

Oh no.

I did it again, didn't I?

Me, sort of yelling (I'm very softspoken, actually, I never get loud): Everyone who left the room for smoke break/potty break/uh, I'll go with one of you break, you can come back now, thanks!

It's time for a whole new obsession...I'll take any and all suggestions! 

(Make sure to take into account my way diminished mental capacity, though. No driving. No sharp objects. No math. Other than that, we're good.)


Tuesday, November 12, 2013

I need freedom now...

NASA Cassini image of Saturn's rings and Earth and moon

That's us...the tiny blue dot in the lower right corner of the picture. We're the prettiest.

So, yeah.

I've totally forgotten how to blog like a normal person, since my mind has been trained to blog about songs.


Let's do current events: 

  • I've been home from work so far this week with a migraine. Ouch. 
  • Right now I'm watching my Cats play Michigan State. Again, ouch. Maybe we'll catch up in the second half.
  • Ooh, now we're only down by 6...
  • Chelsea made a Christmas stocking for our living room floor-sleeper who I'm not allowed to talk about anymore ever ever again. 
  • The stocking is pink with white fur and pink sequins. It's truly impressive. I don't know where my daughter got her mad skills, because it's not from me. From my grandma, I guess.

It's occurred to me that if I blog every single day for the rest of the year, I will reach my 2004 blog post total. Can I do it?

Someone had better be shooting me some blogging ideas!

Monday, November 11, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 30 - Your favorite song at this time last year

I know.

I'm so original.

It can't be helped. It'd be different if they were fluffy copycat one-hit wonders.


So with this perfect performance, I'm wrapping up the 30 song, 30 day challenge. :)

Sunday, November 10, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 29 - A song from your childhood


It was my last year in Germany.

I know now, of course, that my knowledge of music at the time was severely limited. But back then, that's just the way it was.

We had one American TV station - the AAFES channel. I wasn't allowed to listen to the radio. The only music I had, in fact, were the Dolly Parton tapes my grandma sent me from the states.

My brother had records in his room, and when he was gone I would sneak in there and listen to them. Lionel Richie, Cyndi Lauper, Madonna, KISS, REO Speedwagon, Prince...I had no idea who any of these people were, but I liked them. 

Well, I liked what little I could listen to, in the very short period of time I was home alone every day.

Then, USA for Africa released the "We Are The World" single and video. 

Surprisingly enough, I was permitted to own a copy of the cassette, AND watch the video.

My parents played the video for me over and over, telling me who the different people were, acting surprised when I had no idea.


Anyway, I love this song. I can identify all the voices now. And, best of all, the song raised $63 million for humanitarian aid in Africa and the US.

Saturday, November 9, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 28 - A song that makes you feel guilty/FREE DAY

I have lots of guilt. I don't think anyone carries as much as The Doctor carries, but I have my fair share. Don't we all?

BUT this will have to be another free day. I cannot think of a song that makes me feel guilty. I don't need a song for that, my top five sins are permanently etched on my brain, they're never going away.

So let's talk music.

The 30 day song challenge is wrapping up and all of a sudden I'm panicking - I'm running out of time, and we haven't even discussed Marvin Gaye!

He's one of my all-time favorite artists...I can listen to him sing all day. I'm sure I don't even need to list any of his songs on here, because everyone knows them. He was a beautiful singer, a beautiful man, and he died tragically and much too young.

In 1983, Marvin Gaye was invited to sing The Star-Spangled Banner at the NBA All-Star Game. His performance ranks right next to Whitney Houston's, in my opinion, as the best Anthem ever.

Friday, November 8, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 27 - A song that you wish you could play

I wish I could play, period.

I haven't played since 2009. 


There is this one song that I love. The lyrics are beautiful, but that's not what I listen to. It's the MUSIC. It's the deceptively simple guitar melodies in the the song goes on, the other instruments come in. While this is happening, the song is coming to a crescendo, and then being brought back down, over and over again, while still staying beautifully simple.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 26 - A song that you can play on an instrument

When we first got our piano, it was just like Christmas for me, no pun intended. I can be obsessive with my new things, and wow!, my piano and I became fast friends.

As soon as I taught myself to play, I set aside all my piano how-to books and started with my 'fake' music. I knew 'fake' music well from playing my guitar, so I was having all kinds of fun! 

If you don't know about 'fake' music, it's essentially cheating. It gives you the melody only, with chord suggestions. You can play the chords however you want. 

But my mom brought home a little Christmas book of songs she thought I might like. NOT fake music.

Anyway, 'O, Holy Night' was in there, taking up I don't know how many pages, and it's such a beautiful song - and VERY difficult to play properly.

So I practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and get the idea, right? LOLOL...

I'm proud to say I that can play O, Holy Night, properly, on the piano.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 25 - A song that makes you laugh

I'm feeling very disgruntled this week.

What's the point of having my very own shiny new iPhone that can do all this fancy stuff, if I can't get on the internet on it while I'm at work. On break! On break!

But I can never get a connection. Maybe for two minutes if I search out some obscure floor of the building and find some weird empty corner.

That's definitely UNhappiness you feel coming from my direction.

So. To cheer me up, and make me laugh, for Day 25 on the list, this song definitely does the trick:

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 24 - A song that you want to play at your funeral

Flogging Molly - Drunken Lullabies

If you don't already know about Flogging Molly, you should! They're just your average everyday Celtic punk band, based out of LA, with a red-haired Irishman for a lead singer. Buy their stuff!

Okay, now, funeral song...


Isn't this a little maudlin? A lot maudlin?

There's no way, in real life, that I would pick a song to play at my funeral. That's just weird.

But for the sake of the list, here you go:

Monday, November 4, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Day 23 - A song that you want to play at your wedding

Oh, this challenge.

I don't know whether I'll be relieved when it's over and I'll get to stop putting my mind into categories where it normally doesn't go; or whether I'm scared for the challenge to stop because then I'll have to start making real journal entries again.


There's so many good songs to play at weddings!

But there's one I love in particular - I feel like it could have been written for how I feel about Dwayne and our seventeen years together.

If and when D and I get married, we're going back to the Empress of Soul:

Saturday, November 2, 2013

30 Songs in 30 Days, Days 21 and 22 - Songs you listen to when you're happy/sad

Happiness just isn't an emotion that comes easily to me.

I think it's overrated.

Now joy...that's another thing.

I remember the joy I felt when my daughter was born and she was placed into my arms for the first time.

I don't need music when I'm feeling joyful.

Sadness, however, is something I struggle with every day. Music does help. Music can inspire me. Music can remind me that I'm still here, and that someone else has felt the same way I do sometimes.

Music can remind me that I'm not alone.

Shaking it out with Florence...

I'm still alive with Pearl Jam...

Not fading to black with Metallica...

I'm never alone with Patty Griffin.