Sunday, August 11, 2013

The Cutthroat World of Michelle's Office

This is where I work. Honestly.

So, a few years ago, a 'friend' of mine at work went out on short-term disability. Don't be alarmed...she did this every year. Only this time, it dragged on, and on...

After eight months or so, her cubicle by the window started looking very inviting. This was a valuable commodity, just going to waste!

So, I claimed it.

This is how you get a desk by the window in my building - you have to be a little sneaky.

So when Kim very surprisingly came back after eleven months out, her stuff had been moved to a different desk. I was very, very apologetic.

She got in little digs, though, about my underhanded method of seat-acquisition, until she got fired a few years later.

I was sad she got fired, but kind of glad, too...I was one of her marks. You know, one of those people that other people who borrow money a lot go up to every week and say, do you have $20, $50, $100, I can borrow? She ended up owing me $1000's of dollars I'll never get back.

I kind of have lots of people out there who owe me money I'll never get back. I have a problem saying no. If I have it, I will give it.

But anyway, back to THE WINDOW.

Since I have moved to the cubicle by THE WINDOW, it has caused me so much grief, it's almost enough to make me want to move...almost, but not quite.

I like the shades DOWN. I have headaches. I don't want sunlight. It HURTS.

But then Mark comes in. He loves sunlight. He pulls the shades one-third of the way up.

I wait one minute, stand up, and pull the shades back down. I go downstairs, get my breakfast, come back up, and the shade's back up.

Mark is laughing.

'Michelle, can't we just have it up a little?'

'Well, I guess, but the glare will kill us, and the heat...what about waiting until the sun gets to the other side.'

'(sigh) Okay...' (This is said very sadly).

I don't know how any work gets done because of the window drama.

When it rains, the shades open because no one has seen rain before, ever.

When it snows, you might as well shut the computers off for the day.

When the window washers are out there, it's all over.  Same goes for when the roofers are working across the street.

And there's always catty remarks from people who want to sit there...They say, 'Well if I sat there I'd have the shades up...she doesn't deserve that seat!'

And I'm thinking very uncharitably, it is so hot over here by the window and you already have hot flashes, no way could you last over here... I try to nip that unkind thinking in the bud but it sneaks out before I can stop it.

Apparently I'm really not that nice.

So that's where we are now.

I work in cubicle-land, where I send very nicely-worded emails all day to people in the US and Canada and the UK and India and the Philippines for the international brokerage side of my large shipping corporation. I avoid making calls as much as possible, EMAILS ARE SO MUCH BETTER!!!

And I LOVE where I sit, in the corner, with a window on one side, where no one can really see me, and I'm hidden away.  Except for when people come to look out the window when it rains, or it's windy, or it snows...sigh...