Friday, August 24, 2007


I've moved and I no longer have a purple door...
But now I live on a hill and there's woods behind me and the view is so wonderful.
My daughter, my kitty and I are living here in varying degrees of contentment.
I'm very happy here, but it's been almost two months and it's still not. quite. home.
All daughter needs is her phone, her laptop, her iPod, and her sketchpads, and she's her usual surly mean self. 
Well, surly and mean to ME, anyway... all of her nice and sweet-ness is used on her friends. 
I thought my kitty was settling in fine, until this week when she went pee-pee TWICE on my bedroom floor.  I had to reread all my cat books, and now I'm worried that she's depressed about the move.
She HAS been meowing a lot, lately.  And asking for a lot of extra treats.
What?  You think that I've spoiled her?
Absolutely... she deserves it!  She's way nicer than the other adolescent who lives here.
I'm tired now...
It took a lot out of me to write this little bit.
I think the anti-depressants I take are the reason I can't write anymore.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

how things fall

I got DSL and so went to free AOL... and now I love my fast access but HATE free AOL.  That's the biggest reason why I never get to check my email anymore or update my journal or keep up with my dear friends' journals... I want my regular AOL back but I don't want to give up fast music downloading to get it..
I had taken my daughter out of the small private Christian school she'd gone to for elementary and middle school and put her in a big public high school for ninth grade, positive I'd made a good decision, and WOW, I was way wrong on that one.  By December she was on her way to failing every class except History, and she was begging to go back to the school that she formerly couldn't wait to get away from.  She witnessed fights and other icky things and would come home every day just kind of shell-shocked...poor thing.
Oh yeah...How did she get an 'A' in History? Well, let's see, first, the class read Lord of the Flies.  And then, for the rest of the semester, the class watched 'Lost'.
Yes...that's correct.  You heard me right.  That was History class.  They watched an episode of 'Lost' every morning.
Is it relevant that her History teacher also happened to be the football coach?
During Christmas break, I made my decision to take her out that school and homeschool her instead, which is what I really wanted to do in the first place back in August but I allowed myself to be talked out of it.  It really isn't very practical because I do work 40 hours a week and I am a single mom but I just couldn't let her go on like that...
So what's going on now is that I'm really, really, really, really busy.  And I'm trying to do way too much and I feel like I'm not getting anything done at all, and I'm worried that I'm not doing my daughter justice, and I worry that she's not getting enough exercise, and that she's not getting a good enough education, and that she's spending too much time online, and that I'm not spending enough 'just us' time with her, and that she resents me too much to ever get over it, and I worry worry worry all the time.
I take lots of medicine, and coincidentally, lots of Pepcid Complete (Cool Mint).  That's my commercial for the evening.