Who knew?
This latest time, it was at Kroger...late...the store was empty, especially the huge produce section. My boyfriend had wandered off, leaving me to get my daughter's bananas.
Apparently, the stress of picking bananas can trigger a panic attack.
There were rows, and rows, of bananas. Groups of two, three, four, five, etc. Yellow ones, slightly green ones, green ones. Big ones, small ones.
I couldn't decide. The task of actually having to pick something out of this mass of yellow and green suddenly seemed like a matter of life and death, and I couldn't do it...
(and I can't believe, that just sitting here writing this, I'm starting to hyperventilate again.)
I don't know how long I stood there, completely helpless. Finally, I saw my boyfriend staring at me from the other end of the section, with an 'are you dawdling again and hurry up!' look on his face, which was sufficiently normal enough to get me to grab some bananas, any bananas!, and get out of that aisle.
This has been happening to me a lot lately, only not usually with bananas. I even called my doctor about it, but flaked out at the last minute and didn't go to the appointment. It's just too embarrassing...because these moments I've been having are triggered by the silliest things...and then it's over and it's like it never happened.
Except that I don't know if I can ever go to that banana section again. Maybe if I went to a different store it would be okay...does Walgreens carry bananas?
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Call your Dr, really. Bridget was on a panic med for about one year, it really helped!
ReplyDeleteMichelle, I can't imagine a panic attack over bananas; I usually get them when face with walking into a crowded area! I hope you get some help for this. -Jan
ReplyDeleteCall your doctor again...I had panic attacks when I was younger, was on meds and did wonders for me!! I haven't had one in a VERY long time. I understand completey what you are going thru!! (My biggest one was getting on a city bus...and that was hard cuz that's how I got to work every day) Take care!! Julie
ReplyDeleteJan, Mary, Julie: Thanks, guys, for making sense. My boyfriend felt that I'm just stressed because my daughter is having some problems right now, and that once she gets better I'll be fine. This has been escalating for months...I've actually called the doctor twice before now, and both times didn't go to the appointment. I am going to call again tomorrow and get it taken care of! I really really needed to hear this, thanks so much!
ReplyDeletei understand. i used to have them unexpectedly for "little" reasons or no reason.
ReplyDeletethen i started having BIG ones, which lasted for about 10-15 minutes where i couldn't breathe. i actually felt like i was suffocating. they were mainly caused by overwhelming circumstances in my life: my son's behavior, financial worries, whatever.
i take Xanax. and it has helped a GREAT deal. i only have maybe one attack a month now. where i used to have them a few times a week.
so help is out there. don't be embarrassed. it happens to many people. you are NOT crazy. make sure you get the help, michelle! you know i love you, chick. trust me and do it. it'll be all be good.
Hi Michelle,
ReplyDeleteThis is nothing to be embarassed about. I used to have them a lot and they put me on Klonopin for a few years until I was weaned off. It really helped a lot. They have different typed of meds. What happened with me is that I would think I am having a heart attack and in the er they took ekgs and saw nothing and then determined it was a heart attack. I also went for biofeedback and it helped.
Take Care,
Anita