Thursday, April 17, 2014

I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve...




You know, I just looked at this picture and remembered that movie Lawnmower Man from a zillion years ago...I remember actually going to the dollar theater and seeing it with a friend of mine, back when we were in high school.

I'm so old.

That theater is now a Steak n' Shake, I think.

So weird, the stuff you suddenly remember out of nowhere. :)

My week has been filled with migraine, work, rehab place to visit my grandpa, moving boxes around my apartment, moving boxes around some more, migraine, migraine, work, migraine.

I also fit in some time to watch the MTV Movie Awards, read a little, tweet a little, play Legend of the Cryptids a little, and I felt terribly guilty THE WHOLE TIME.

And...I went to the basement by myself for the first time to wash clothes and nearly died on the stairs. It was dark, and I managed to miss the last step completely. Luckily, there was a wall right in front of me for me to smash into.

Staircases - I just don't do well on them, for some reason.

So...you know my co-worker Mark, right? The one who's now my landlord? Well, we're old cronies at work, we've sat next to each other for years...he's the one I bestowed my window seat to earlier this year.

We've worked in the same office at the same job for the last 15 years or so, and we're considered 'old-timers' on our team. We recently acquired a new person, who's been with the company maybe 7 or 8 months...and wow, I just don't know how we're going to break her in.

I've caught her several times asking our supervisor for MORE WORK. Then, I heard that she went and asked ANOTHER team's supervisor for more work. THEN, if that wasn't bad enough, I overheard her bragging about the fact that she had to go and ask for more work.

Oh, boy.

But the really funny, awful thing happened on Tuesday.

Tuesday, I was sitting at my desk, typing up an email, minding my own business, when I heard New Girl walk up behind me and start talking to Mark. So of course, I immediately ceased minding my own business and started listening.

New Girl: Hi Mark...
Mark (warily): Hi...
New Girl: Um, I was working on some of your accounts...

(Here's me, thinking, OMG, if you even so much as touch one of MY accounts I will END YOU!!)
(sorry...I have rage)

New Girl: And um...don't take this the wrong way...

(Here it comes, that phrase is never followed by anything good)

New Girl: But...WHAT do you DO all day?

(??? Oh no she didn't!)

New Girl: I mean, these are in such bad shape, some of them, and I was just wondering, why...

Mark, after being momentarily stunned into silence, very gracefully told her what he did all day, as he is the leader of our group and does all the things that we don't have to do.

Finally, New Girl left.

Seconds pass by, then, at the same time, Mark and I slowly scoot our chairs back until we can see each other behind the cubicle wall.

Gut-splitting laughter ensues.

We're trying to talk as we're gasping for air.

"Did you hear-"

"Did she just say-"

Finally, Mark gets it out...

"If she'd been one of us, I would have told her the truth.

"What do I do all day?

"AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE!"

This is the mantra of someone who has worked in the same job for years and years and years.

:)

Poor New Girl. It's not her fault she's new and gung-ho, but it IS her fault that she asked one of the rudest questions I've ever heard, and jokes have abounded in our pod the last couple of days about what we do all day.

Besides work, that is.

Miss you all...

:(

28 comments:

  1. Sounds like...
    never mind. I can't say that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Argh!, you can't do that!

      If you were going to say she's going to render us obsolete, don't worry, it's already been said...

      :(

      Delete
  2. Work is stressful. I don't do it any more. One gets through it. You will. It's good to see the humor of it --in fact it's imperative.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It IS stressful, but it's good that I love my job, and I love a good challenge. The only bad thing is that my migraines are keeping me from work now and I hate it.

      Delete
  3. Some people work to live, and other live to work. I have always known which group I wanted to be in.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too! I try to be fully engaged when I'm there, and then leave it behind the minute I walk out the door...I'm lucky that I love my job, but it's still just work.

      There's a reason 'work' isn't called 'happy fun time'.

      Delete
  4. I hate overachievers.

    Oh, remember to turn on the basement light before you venture down! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tell me about it!

      I thought I did turn on the light! I can never do anything right...and basements freak me out to begin with, I've been watching too much Supernatural.

      Delete
  5. Oh New Girl...Want to join Floor Sleeper?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I didn't realize until now that they both irritate me the exactly same way. Just...rude people!

      But I guess if there wasn't rude people, I would have nothing to write about on my blog...

      Delete
  6. lmao, well at least she is gung ho and doesn't expect things to be handed to her like 99% of the newbies today. But yeah i agree, do as little as possible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's been so long since I was a newbie, I can't remember what I was like, but I do remember an overachiever phase, LOL. But yeah, now, I do as little as possible too. I do it with excellence, of course...LOL! But I absolutely lack ambition - as evidenced by staying in the same job for 15 years! :)

      Delete
  7. ohh, you write humor :)
    Good !
    Blessed Easter :) God bless.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, thank you! Happy Belated Easter to you! :)

      Delete
  8. I thought this was a great post, Mitch. I really enjoyed reading it. Starting with the random stuff people remember our of nowhere to 'AS LITTLE AS POSSBILE!!'

    :) :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Suze! I'm so glad it kinda made sense...I've been doing things under a migraine haze for weeks, so I don't know anymore! :)

      Delete
  9. I'm so sorry to hear about your migraines. I hope the leave you alone soon! And, what is it with you and stairs? I thought I was bad with doorknobs, but you take the cake, my friend!

    Elsie
    AJ's wHooligan in the A-Z Challenge

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knooow! I'm thinking at this point, I'm just assuming that I'm going to fall, so then I fall. I think there's a word for that. ?

      Delete
  10. Sounds like Mark handled that well--it is difficult when someone like that does not have the grace to not try and embarrass others. Folks like that usually get an earful sooner or later.

    Sorry to hear about your stairs fall. I am prone to do that periodically as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh no! I hate that you're also burdened with my affliction...I try to take ramps whenever possible now. :)

      Delete
  11. Work sounds like a whirly swirly wind. I guess I could ask that question too, as to what do people do all day at work? I really have no clue because I've never worked outside the home. But I'm sure New Girl must have a clue as to what goes on at a work place. haha
    Terrible sorry you suffer with migraines. That must be a terrible burden.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You know, on days like this, where I have just a whisper of a headache, I'm like, what migraines?

      But last week, I was in bed from Thursday through Monday, with a terrible migraine, and I just didn't know how I was going to live with it anymore.

      Yeah, I really hate them! :)

      Delete
  12. Could just be because she is newer - asking the supervisor for more work makes everyone else look kinda bad! Give her time and she'll become "normal" :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope so! It really does make everyone look bad...I've tried t think of ways to gently let her know without hurting her feelings. I haven't figured it out yet. I so love my job! LOL

      Delete
  13. Well as long as you can get some fun out of it... That would be me--the overachiever in the office, but my goodness, I'd never actually pry into someone else's work and then confront them about it. That takes moxie. Maybe not the best kind of moxie, but... Well, she'll either end up quitting or being promoted, eh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope so!
      No wait, that's mean...I just think she needs some practice working with other people, LOL! :)

      Delete
  14. Wow, she really asked that?? In a place where people could HEAR the question? She may be an over achiever, but she's a super-dumb one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knooow! People sitting all around...poor thing, it'll be talked about forever. At least by me, LOLOL...

      Delete